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April 23, 2008 >> 10:24:08 AM
Erik Rasmussen's Calling
I was a freshmen in college and very young in my walk with God. Everything around me was changing, but it seemed to be for the best. As I saw my desires and wants and hopes grow into God, I realized that I wanted to share this story. I remember going to my mentor’s office and not understanding why everyone did not want to do ministry. It made no sense to me, because I couldn’t imagine doing anything greater. (I am very selfish and can’t usually see beyond my own scope. This is one of those times.) In this experience, I realized I’m probably called to ministry.
As the years went on, I could think of nothing greater than to live like Paul did. Moving from one city to the next declaring God’s beauty, truth, and life. But at the same time, I had an inexplicably immense desire to be married. These two lives couldn’t be melded together (at least in my mind). I struggled for quite some time with whether I was called to live like Paul or to be married and maybe pursue a ministry with more stability. Then one day I was sitting at church and I felt like God showed me that I didn’t have to be a missionary, I could be a pastor here or something else of the like. This was quite strange because I hadn’t even been thinking about it. All of the sudden it just popped into my head. I had release from one calling, and I had a choice I could make.
I’m only just now realizing this, but it seems that at this point, God began to reform my calling. For the last couple of years, I have had a huge burden for the church in the United States. I don’t know how long this has been here, but it feels like forever. I don’t long for other countries anymore, it is strange to me that I ever did want to live like Paul.
Only this morning I read a question that asked this, “What would you attempt to do if you knew that you could not fail?” There was no doubt or hesitation. I would make a retreat center for pastors in the UM church to come and stay and be renewed for and encouraged to claim a deeper life for themselves and their congregation. A reminder that we were never called to play church, but instead to be the church.
Is this my calling? Maybe, J.
Erik Rasmussen is a first year Master’s of Divinity student at ATS from Louisiana.
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